On the ninth day of blogmas I am going to share a list of things which you should never say to a person who is struggling with their mental health.
“Quit being depressed all the time.”
Life would be so much easier if it was up to us to chose if we want to be depressed or not. But sadly that is not the case! I can assure you that there isn’t a single person on this entire planet who would want to be depressed. You might be joking or half-joking but the only effect it has on the person concerned is negative.
“You are not even trying to have fun.”
This is another example of how ignorant we tend to be towards others. If someone has made an effort to be with you despite their internal struggles, you have to have an insane amount of respect for them! There is nothing bad in having less ‘fun’ so please be considerate next time and try to be supportive. Thank you, next.
“You should smile more often.”
This statement is the most annoying statement ever! Why would someone smile if they are not feeling happy? Asking someone to smile is asking them to fake their feelings and hide their true emotions. That is the worst way to deal with mental health.
“It’s all in your head.”
Of course, it is, because that’s where my brain is! It’s funny how everyone wants to behave like a psychologist and give unsolicited advice. It’s all in your head is the worst way of brushing the problem under the carpet. The theory, ‘if it’s not visible, it’s not there’ doesn’t work here.
Jokes about mental health.
Nobody has given you the right to make fun of their issues. You have to have this much understanding of the world, even little kids know the difference between right and wrong. There are things which are completely unacceptable and joking about somebody’s mental health is among the top five of that list.
“What a luxury it would be to stay in bed all day!?”
I want to tell you how desperately I want to switch places with you but at the same time, I don’t. Because staying in bed all day is the worst feeling ever, you feel out of control, your brain keeps messing with you, trust me it’s not a good place to be in. I would rather be anywhere than being in my bed all day.
“What exactly is wrong with you?”
People need to understand that it is rude to ask about somebody’s medical conditions, that’s the reason why there exists a doctor-patient confidentiality clause. It’s difficult enough to talk about it with the doctor and If I want to share my problems with you, I would, but please don’t come to me asking what is wrong with you.
“What caused this problem?”
Nobody has the right to ask this question unless they are therapists or professions, and not just any therapist, your therapist. Sometimes you think you are helping them by asking such questions but you are only harming them, messing with their progress. And when a loved one asks, we try to tell them but it could trigger a reaction which is the worst. So please, just don’t!
“The mental-health issues are a new way to stay relevant.”
There are tons of harmless things to stay relevant, why would someone choose to suffer to be relevant? Just educate yourself before speaking such stupid things.
By the way, I am not making these statements up, I have heard them quite often directed towards me or towards someone I know. This just shows the lack of awareness and empathy in our society. I hope we quickly get rid of the taboo that revolves around mental health.
Hope you have a good mental health!
Thanks for reading.